In one of the historic homes of downtown Charleston, there’s a Latin motto painted across the wall of the dining room that translates to:
“Anticipation is Superior to Vengeance”
It was a reminder from the builder of the home back in the 1700s to all generations who would eat in that room, to make smart choices. Never send your ships to the Orient during hurricane season.
If you make good decisions, you’ll never have any reason to get angry.
I found this story while reading a great piece of copy on real estate investing — on the subject of due diligence. This is the process of determining what you are getting into when you are considering buying a property. How do you know if the property is solid, or if it’s a money pit?
Expert investors know what to look for. They know the telltale signs which indicate serious problems. And they know when they’ve found a massive bargain.
But how did they acquire these skills?
Experience. Lots and lots of experience.
Why experience matters
I’ve always believed experiences are good for us. Experiences, both positive and negative, help us grow. We learn. We evolve. So that’s why I always say “Do it.”
Go on the adventure.
Jump off the bridge.
Meet new people.
Travel.
Fall in love.
Experience heartbreak.
And hopefully, you’re a better person for having gone through it.
I know for certain my experiences have shaped the way I see the world. I grew up in a wonderful town, but if I had never left, I can’t imagine what my life would be like now. I can’t go back and unsee what I’ve seen. I believed what I did back then because that was as big as my world was. Now that my world is so much larger — now that I’ve been there, I see so much more.
So… experience.
But there’s more than that. Experience alone is not enough.
Receive the experience
Ever see a person get out of a bad relationship, only to get right into an equally bad relationship weeks later?
What’s going on here?
They had the experience. They suffered from it. They had the life lesson.
And they did absolutely nothing with it! Over and over and over again. They keep making the exact same mistakes.
I know there are other factors at play that are too detailed to get into here, but the point stands.
It’s not just relationships, though.
I spent several years in Europe working as a contractor on an American army base. We were surrounded by rich culture and history, and while I delighted in taking full advantage of my surroundings, it amazed me to see so many other Americans had no interest in exploring the world around them — they’d just complain that thing were different than they were back home, without taking any opportunity to celebrate those differences.
So it’s not enough to experience things.
You have to receive the experience.
The point of the experience
Use what you learn to take you in new directions. Challenge your ideas and beliefs of how you think things SHOULD be when you find evidence that proves that wrong. Don’t stubbornly hold onto things that don’t serve you, just because you always have believed those things. It’s ok to expand.
Let your experiences teach you, and be open to expand your thinking when new experiences don’t match with your model of the world.
If you want to get the most out of life, try to get the most out of your experiences!
That’s it for this week. Until next time, keep stepping!